The Kids Behind the Blog: February 2017

February, the month of love.

There is no one I love more than my kids...

I absolutely adore the little people they are becoming and they become more entertaining with each passing month. I'm linking up with The Kids Behind the Blog for this month's love themed questions.

1) What does the word love mean to you?

-"You pray for peoples' hearts. You say kind things."
Be still my heart. Even at nearly 4 she gets it better than a lot of adults.

2) Kids choice! How do you want to spend Valentine's Day?

-"I want to go dancing."
I guess we'll be doing some dancing on Valentine's Day.

3) Do you have a Valentine? If so, who?

-"Yes. My friend Tessa at school 'cause she's my friend."

4) How many days are in the month of February?

-"4"
She will be 4 in April...so everything is currently revolving around the number 4.

5) How do you show someone you love them?

-"I love my teachers. I be kind."
She truly is such a kind and helpful little girl. She makes me feel like we're doing something right as parents.

I hope you'll join us for the link-up. I love reading what your kids come up with.

5 Things You Might Not Know About Me

I loved Lisa's 10 Things You Might Not Know About Me post so much that I was inspired to create my own. Like Lisa, I feel a lot of my posts lately have been more on the serious side. That is just the season of life I am in right now. It's good to walk the waters of light heartedness more often then not, especially during difficult seasons. Thanks again Lisa for reminder.

The following are 5 things you may or may not know about me...

1. Iced Coffee

I treat myself once a week to a wonderfully flavored ice coffee from one of my favorite coffee spots. If you are ever coming through Madison Heights, VA, you should definitely stop in at The Bean Barn. Their Iced Salted Caramel Mochas are delish!

2. Libraries

I love the smell of libraries...or rather the books that are in the libraries. There is something so comforting and nostalgic about the smell of well worn pages. I love the weight of the books in my hands. This year I've been determined to spend a little me time, most of which has centered around reading. I've posted my list of reads from January and I'd love to hear any title or author suggestions you have.

3. Sunglasses

I LOVE sunglasses. I especially love ones with large lenses. Call me cheap, but the most I've ever spent on a pair is only like $12. I do not do name brands. In fact, most of them have come from a dollar store or Walmart. When you lose things like I do, it does not make sense to spend tons of money on a pair of sunglasses.

3. Green

My favorite color is green...almost every shade. I steer away from the puke-like or neon.

4. "Prayer Ordered" Children

The Bible tells us to come boldly to the throne with our requests. Before I knew I'd face matters of infertility, I had secretly hoped and prayed for a little girl. I did not stop there. I remember whispering a prayer that if He should so see fit to grant my wish list, I'd like the following: A little girl with red hair and blue eyes. I also really wanted her to have her father's dimples. I know it seems silly, but most of us have been guilty of wishing for certain traits and characteristics. After a lengthy struggle, I decided I would take whatever the Lord would grant. I just hoped for a whole and healthy baby. When we conceived, I just knew I was having a girl. I cannot explain it. However, when she was born with platinum blonde hair, I believed it would eventually turn brown, just as her father's had. At about 5 months however, it became evident that her hair was turning red. I now have a beautiful, red haired, blue eyed daughter that has her daddy's dimples. How cool is that?! God does not mind if we get specific.

5. Boats

I do not like boats. Big or small, I fear them all. I don't know why but I vaguely remember a very frightening ride with my cousins as a young child. Maybe this was the cause. I like the idea of a leisurely float down a river or a cruise to some far off place, but the thought of actually getting on one sends my blood pressure and anxiety levels soaring. I know this sounds crazy from a person who loves the outdoors so much, not to mention that I'm a pretty decent swimmer. Please know I have tried to overcome this fear...and yet, at 31 years old, I have yet to overcome it.

Do any of these surprise you?

Feel free to jump on board and share some of your "unknowns". It really is a lot fun!

Book Reviews: January 2017

I made a vow to myself that I would begin taking better care of myself this year. That not only includes my physical health, but my mental health as well. I have not been good about carving out “me time” and as I have reflected upon those things that I miss doing, reading for pleasure was near the top of the list. I have since made a point to have some reading time before going to bed almost every evening. It allows me to unwind and escape.

January Reads

I thought I’d share what I’ve been reading. These reviews are my personal opinions and I have not been compensated in any way for sharing my thoughts.

Taming the To-Do List by Glynnis Whitwer

It was an encouraging read about how to make the best of your choices. There was not anything particularly profound in my opinion, but I loved how she backed up a lot of what she said with science. It just proves that we try to do too much and that we were not meant to live that way.

 

Whistlin’ Dixie in a Nor-Easter by Lisa Patton

This read was a little slow for my taste. The story line was fine and the characters were likable. I have another one of her novels on my list for later reading. I’m hoping that I’ll like it better than this one.

 

The Magnolia Story by Chip and Joanna Gaines

I LOVED this book. I could not put it down. There was a lot of laundry that did not get done in the two days it took me to get through its pages. I am late to the Fixer-Upper stage, but I am hooked. I am so smitten with their story and their style. I cannot recommend this book enough!

 

One Thousand White Women by Jim Fergus

This book toyed with every emotion. There were parts that were so startling that it was hard to read. His word imagery is amazing and I felt like I was witnessing the joys and devastations along with the characters. Fergus is a great writer. This book is not for the faint of heart. It is not one that I would read again, but it is also not one that I’ll soon forget.

 

Yes Please by Amy Poehler

I wanted to like this more than I did. I loved her style of writing and her path to stardom was interesting. While I did not expect a saintly worded narrative, I was not prepared for the amount of (what I consider vulgar) language that would be incorporated on the pages. While I know this is not a deal breaker for a lot of readers, I struggled to get through it. I still find her adorable and I will forever love her character on Parks and Rec. She is so talented, funny and her experience is valuable.

Linking up for WWRW

Currently: January 2017

I have not done a “currently” post in a while. It has been a challenging few months to say the least. My life has taken lots of altering turns since I last posted this type of piece in September 2016. Who knew that only a month later things would look so different.

Thinking About: I am thinking about all of the things I need to do in February. There is a lot to plan and look forward to. I’ve also been doing a lot of self-reflection, which has been both enlightening and difficult.

Working On: I am working on pulling ideas from my New House Pinterest boards. We sold our house at the beginning of January and in a couple of weeks we’ll meet with our builder to settle on final selections that will eventually bring the look of our new house together. The kitchen and living room have always been the heart of our home. I am so excited about finally having a streamline style throughout the house. Here are a few of the ideas inspiring the look of our new home.

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Learning: I am re-learning how to live happy. My joy cannot be taken. It comes from my love and relationship with Jesus. My happiness however, comes and goes. I have to choose my attitude. I used to be so “glass half full” but for a while now, I’ve felt that cup emptying. I am re-learning how to rejoice in ALL things. I am choosing to look on the bright side.

Watching: The only two shows I currently watch faithfully are Alone and Curse of Oak Island. I do not watch much television and we try to not let it necessarily be how we spend our family time so I am always behind on the latest TV drama. However, when these two shows are on (which are thankfully on after the kids go to bed) you can find me propped on the couch, eyes glued to the screen. These are shows that both my husband and I enjoy together.

Listening to: The radio. The CD player in my Jeep is malfunctioning and until my hubs can fix it, I find myself listening to our favorite radio station, 88.3 The Journey.

Reading: Wild by Cheryl Strayed. I’ve read several books this month. In fact, I’ve read more this past month than I have in the last few years. I hope to do a review post soon. I’ve been carving out reading time in the evenings as a way of working on self-care. Since meeting with my new counselor, I’ve become more motivated to take care of myself again.

Trying: I am trying to get back into my low carb way of eating. I did pretty well last week and lost almost 3lbs. I knew this would be a challenge and the last few days have been what I would consider flops. I just have to remind myself that every choice counts. My menu for February is looking good and I am becoming more determined daily. I have goals that I want to reach and I have things that I want to see happen. Some of these things are heavily influenced by my weight. I can do this!

Loving: I am loving my husband. The last few months have helped me see him with fresh eyes. He has changed in so many amazing ways and I am SO proud of the man he has become. God has been working in both of us and I find myself frequently falling in love with my sweet hubs over and over again. The pain and healing we have gone through since October has only strengthened our relationship together and as a couple with God. Life with him is not always beautiful, but it is our kind of perfect.

Low Carb Mini Sausage Biscuits

Low carb works for me and I have been trying to get it to work for my family as well. This can be challenging since my littles are not always on board. They will try everything I put before them, but they are quick to let me know which way their favor is going to go. I’ve also been learning how to work with almond flour. I definitely prefer it over coconut flour.

I find myself needing a lot more inspiration this time around. Prior to being off the low carb wagon for personal and medical reasons, I was doing great with making low carb meals. As I was making this month’s menu, I realized that I was a little burnt out on some of the dishes I was making and I knew if I was, my family certainly was.

This led me to making a purchase that I will hopefully review later. It has also led me to getting a little more creative in the kitchen. I used to think that a low carb way of life meant that you had to live without the food you love. Not so. Today’s recipe is living proof. I tried the original recipe by Peace Love and Low Carb and really liked it. I enjoyed them so much that I began trying different versions, adapting here and there and my sausage version has become a family favorite.

I love these little cheesy nuggets. Best yet, they are low carb, easy to make, freeze well and are toddler approved!

Ingredients*

4oz low fat cream cheese, softened

1 egg

1 ¼ c shredded, sharp cheddar cheese

½ tsp garlic powder

½ tsp onion powder

½ tsp Italian seasoning

1 ¼ c almond flour

¼ c heaving cream

¼ c water

4oz ground maple or breakfast sausage, browned and drained

 Directions

Preheat oven to 350.

In your mixer, cream the cream cheese until smooth and then add the egg. Blend well. Add the seasoning, spices and cheese. Mix on low or mix by hand with a spoon.

Combine the flour, cream and water with the cheese mixture until it is well incorporated. Gently mix in the sausage.

Scoop generous tablespoons of batter into a well-greased mini muffin tin. Bake at 350 for 25 minutes or until golden and no longer spongy to the touch.

Serve warm or cool and then freeze. If freezing, simply thaw and warm in the microwave until it reaches your desired temperature.

My kids are “dippers” and these pair well with ketchup or syrup.

Makes approximately 10 servings (3 muffins).

Nutrition (according to MyFitness Pal): Calories 339, Fat 28.8g, Sodium 475mg, Net Carbs 3.8g

* The fat content, as well as all other nutritional values will change depending upon the types of ingredients you choose to use. For example, full fat vs low fat cream cheese.

The add-ins are endless!

Sifting through the Wreckage: The Need for Self-care after Tragedy

Tragedy is defined as “a lamentable, dreadful, or fatal event or affair; calamity; disaster.” Yep. That about sums it up. Unfortunately, there is not one person who can avoid tragedy. The degree of tragedy is both perceived and real and can only be determined by the person experiencing it. This also means that the methods of coping, mending and moving on will vary.

 Regardless of the type or level of tragedy, self-care needs take place.

 While I am not a doctor or psychologist, I have had a lot of experience as a CPS Social Worker, Behavior Specialist and teacher, working with others that have faced various degrees of trauma. I have seen the spirals. I have connected people with resources and watched them recover and mend. I’ve been the advocate, the shoulder to cry on and the voice of reason.

 I will be perfectly honest that it has been really difficult being on this side of tragedy. 3 months ago my world was changed. I have always been the “fixer” and I have since found myself not being able to fix anything.  I also know that the unhealthy eating habits, unaddressed emotions and situational avoidance that I’ve been dealing with are not proactive ways to care for myself.

 The week of Christmas, we took the kids out to look at Christmas lights. On the way, I, yet again, found my mind wandering back to October 11^th. I was revisited by the sights and smells. I could hear the sounds…the screams, the cries. I could hear my own voice pleading to God. Crying is a typical response for me these days, and, as my husband asked if I was okay, I finally admitted that no, I was not okay.

 It was time for me to do what I have helped others do for years. I needed to take care of myself.

 Self-care looks different for everyone. During that drive, on what should be a joyful, fun filled evening, I sifted through what I and my husband felt needed to be addressed.

-Emotional eating

-Avoidance

-Nightmares and flashbacks

-Triggers

After sifting through these things with my husband, we both agreed that I would benefit from counseling.

So what does my self-care look like?

I have been counseling with my pastor and now, a licensed counselor.

I have been attempting to regain a control of my eating. I have been planning my meals again, shopping for low-carb options, and meal prepping.

I have been slowly working my way back into small group settings.

I have been praying…a lot. My prayers have been transformed since October 11^th. God has revealed Himself in new ways and I have learned so much about His character. He has grown me in the most unexpected ways.

My Beauty from Ashes Journal-I have been keeping a journal. At the top of the page I have titled it Beauty from Ashes. It is a running list of all of the good things that have come from this tragedy. On the days when I cannot see past the tears, a look at the list of blessings that have stemmed from the heartache, bring me back to God’s goodness.

This is what self-care currently looks like in my life.

Whatever self-care needs to look like for you, please take the first step forward. Seek out professional help or a trusted friend that will guide you through the process. There is no shame in taking care of yourself. There is no shame in seeking out help for what is altering your life. Tragedy takes on many forms and so does self-care.

What I’ve learned up to this point is that it is better not to wait. In order to move forward, you have to take the first step. I’ve also learned that the first step should not be taken alone. Rally the support you need, even if that can only begin with one person. You will make it through this. You really will be okay…maybe not now, but one day. You will be okay.

Psalms 62:5-8

Let all that I am wait quietly before God, for my hope is in Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress, where I will not be shaken. My victory and honor come from God alone. He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me. Oh my people, trust in Him at all times. Pour out your heart to Him, for God is our refuge.

Farewell to Our First Home

In the fall of 2008 I moved into a quaint little Cape that nestled itself against the backdrop of the Blue Ridge Mountains. From August to October of that year, I painted and prepped that little house for what would be the first chapter of my upcoming marriage. In October 2008, we exchanged vows, I changed my last name, and we began a life together in that little house.

 Photo Credit: Realtor April Bailey

Much has happened in and outside of those walls. We survived storms of all sorts. We hosted friends, family and strangers. We reaped the harvest of a modest garden and hiked the surrounding apple orchards. We watched sunrises and sunsets. We made that little house a home.

Some of our fondest and saddest memories to date have been made in that house.

It is the house that we brought both of our babies home to.

 It's where G began to love cooking and baking...

It is where we spent countless hours outside with each passing season...

It was where we got the news that my father and grandfather passed...both in 2012, just months apart.

It's where birthdays and holidays were celebrated with such joy.

It is the home where I would fall in love with my husband over and over again.

It was my sanctuary at the end of a long day.

For 8 years it was the place I called "home".

We tested the vows of marriage as we took on renovation projects…some of which were only finished because we put the house on the market.

Why would we leave such a strongly built, memory containing, scenic spot? Simple. We had another dream. About 4 years into our marriage we decided that one day we would build. We loved the idea of starting with a blank slate and creating a house that encompassed all that we’d like in a house. A couple years ago we were blessed to purchase 28 acres. The view is stunning and the location is ideal considering my husband and I work in opposite directions. We are hoping to finally break ground by the end of February or early March.

 This is a dream we have had and to see it all start to come together is overwhelming in the best way. God has shown us his favor through this whole process. It began with the land purchase. It then began to come together even more when we were able to rent from my in-laws and move out in order to finish some projects and leave the house empty for sale. Within about 3 weeks of being on the market, a couple fell in love with the location and our little house and as of this week, the ownership was transferred from us to them. Everything has come together beautifully and we could not have asked for a better outcome for all involved.

I look forward to sharing this next part of our journey as it unfolds. Until then, I’ll leave you with some of the sweet memories that made our first home so dear.

Linking up for Mommy Moments