Before

Mercy me! What a week. So far this week I've dealt with a strong willed infant, a sick dog, a sick husband, a semi-flooded basement, and little productivity.  I never want to sound like I'm complaining because it could always be worse and I am so truly blessed...I am just stating the facts. I'm wiped out.

As I sit rocking my wailing 3 month old I try to remember what life was like "before". There are times I miss being able to just pick up and go. I could sit through an entire movie. I could eat a complete meal uninterrupted. I could sleep in. However, I also had a huge hole in my heart. I faced a bitter sadness and longing almost everyday. I didn't know how love could run so strong and so deep. So as I sit rocking my wailing 3 month old I remember those days and have no desire to return to how things before. These moments are temporary and the sweet memories are priceless.

We have a special end of the summer trip coming up. I can't wait to share details at a later date.

While I try to prepare for our trip, (and mentally prepare to go back to work in 2 weeks) I can't help but look back at the past 3 months. Our little girl will be 3 months old tomorrow and I can't believe how fast the time has gone! She has hit so many milestones and has changed in so many bittersweet ways. She has become my life. I think about how much I love her and to think that God loves us even more than that is almost inconceivable. I would give my life for her, but to think about giving her life for the sake of someone else? Unfathomable. The willingness of God to give His only son for me just proves how amazingly vast His love is.

I also look at the challenges I've overcome and I am acutely aware of other challenges I continue to face. Only God can do the moving I need. Only He knows my heart completely...

Well, it looks like the remainder of my day will consist of loving on my sweet girl, tending to my sickly husband and beginning to prepare the house and our things for our upcoming trip. Remember, as I must, try and find joy in all things.

 

"Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." James 1:2-4

Just for Fun
Over the last 3 months my daughter has changed preference of pacifiers three times. Lets hope this isn't a personality precursor...